Red-Do Not Travel I'm thinking this map needs to be updated. |
I originally
wanted to write something light, something to (hopefully) make you laugh. However, since the world continues to be a
dangerous place, I felt compelled to write something a little darker.
To be sure, the
following consists of my understanding of facts and opinions of same. You're more than welcome to take issue with these
interpretations. That said, I can't
possibly be the only one in the world who thinks this way. With
that in mind, I'll press on.
If you really have
a problem with my point of view, there's always the next history of the world
or some other bits of nonsense which are sure to grace (?) this corner of the
blogosphere soon. That's really where I
feel most comfortable, anyhow.
"Well, I'm here now. May as well hang around and see what the little troll has to say." |
If you'd like to hang around, though, by all means...hang around.
"What did I just say?" |
On the bright side, if I am wildly wrong, it's not like this is going to wind up on the front page of the Wall Street Journal or on Fox News.
It's just going to be between you, me, and the people who foolishly blunder onto this site while searching for Anime porn.
As if there's anything wrong with that.
Unless you've been living under a rock or in
Hollywood, you'd know there's something very bad brewing near the Black Sea.
"Sea of Color." |
I'm not confident a lot of Americans actually understand what is going on in Ukraine (or would that be "The" Ukraine?), much less find it on a map.
"So, it's like trying to decide if it's 'The' Batman or just plain 'Batman'?" |
To a lot of Americans, it's just something going on way over there. After all, we've got enough to worry about on this side of the Atlantic. Like whether we should allow dudes to swim against women in college swimming.
Growing up, the
only interaction I had with anything Ukrainian was with the neighbors a
few houses down. Plus, Ukrainians make kick-ass pierogies.
Wait. Wouldn't that be the Slovaks? Or the Poles? See what I mean |
Still, as a child I at least knew where the country was.
It was part of the
Soviet Union. Way over there.
In the last decade
of the 20th century as the USSR disintegrated (frankly, given what's going on
in our country nowadays, I'm much less inclined to yuk it up than I used to be-another
story for another day, though), Ukraine
(I'm just going to dispense with "The"-it's clumsy, wordy, and puts me over the word
limit imposed by Blogger*) was one of those countries that decided they were
better off not being under Moscow's thumb.
Needless to say
(perhaps), the loss of Ukraine was quite a blow to Mother Russia. One of the largest regions of Europe, it
included a couple significant seaports, Odessa and Sevastopol, home of the
Soviet Black Fleet.
And the sexiest women on the planet. |
In addition to these crucial "warm water ports" (pay attention...you'll hear that phrase again), Ukraine also possessed the third largest nuclear arsenal in the world. Of course, this made the Russians a little uneasy, as well as the nations of the West. Certainly, nobody wanted yet another player in the "Nuclear Club."
After Pakistan,
there wasn't any more room, you understand.
With that in mind,
the United States, United Kingdom, and the Russian Federation (oh, the
irony) signed the Budapest Memorandum in 1994 which basically guaranteed
the sovereignty of Ukraine as grateful appreciation for its acceptance of
non-proliferation.
So, the Ukrainians,
silly rabbits, trusted them and went ahead and listed their nukes on eBay. Where they were promptly snatched up by North
Korea.
Just kidding.
But, would you be surprised, though? |
Anyway, the wheels began to fly off the bus only twenty years later when Russia annexed the Crimea, citing pro-Russian sentiments on the peninsula. Yeah, Sudetenland, anyone?
I'm sure it had
nothing to do with the fact that Sevastopol was in Crimea.
What did NATO do,
you might wonder? Well, Crimea remains
in Russian hands. Not that I advocate
dropping the 82nd Airborne there to throw them out, you understand.
Fast forward only eight years later and Vladimir Putin has upwards of 100,000 troops surrounding the former Soviet Republic. The West holds its breath as it anticipates an incipient Russian invasion. Personally, I think they'll wait until after the Olympics, but I could be wrong.
Ditto China and Taiwan. But, remember what I said. One crisis at a time.
What is motivating
Russia, you may ask? Well, for one, the
former Soviet Union is loathe to have a potential member of NATO on their
doorstep (sidebar, your honor? To be
fair, how would we react if Canada were to suddenly become part of the Warsaw
Pact? Or Russian missiles be parked in
Cuba?).
Oh. Hang on. We've seen that movie before. |
Beyond a desire to reconstitute the former glory of the Motherland, Putin is seeking what the Soviets, and the Czars before him, have sought: a warm water port. Russia, to be sure, is one honking huge country. However, as big as it is, with a massive coastline, it is essentially landlocked. Most of its ports are either inaccessible to the ocean, or frozen over for much of the year. To gain the open ocean has been at the forefront of Russian foreign policy from Peter the Great until today.
Peter the Great Not to be confused with his cousin, Sergei the Meh |
With that in mind,
having access to the Black Sea will give you access to the Mediterranean Sea
which will give you access to the Atlantic Ocean and beyond.
I may not like it
(but, seriously, who am I?), but those are the facts.
Of course, the
NATO countries have worked themselves into a tizzy over Ukraine's predicament. Well, except Germany. No, wait.
Germany sent helmets. And strudel
MREs.
Berlin wisely decided that nudies of Angela Merkel would be considered an act of war, though. |
They cite the old "give them an inch, they'll take a mile" adage (which, for Europeans, may be "give them a meter, they'll take a kilometer"). They fear a repeat of Nazi Germany's incursions into Austria and Czechoslovakia and earnestly want to nip Putin's maneuverings in the bud.
For our part, the Eggplant-in-Chief
is especially incensed. I'm sure it has
nothing to do with his abject failures with the economy, COVID, and inner-city
crime. One does have to wonder why he's
so laser-focused on the Ukrainian border while our own southern border is about
as strong as cotton candy, though.
NOTE: One Brandon apologist condescended to remind
me that Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, and California aren't faced with a hundred
thousand man army at their back door. I
maintain that, no, it's worse. But, I digress.
Wag the dog comes
to mind.
Still, Ukraine is virtually surrounded, so I will try to keep my cynicism in check. That said, Joe Biden is no John F. Kennedy or Ronald Reagan. Hell, he's not even as competent as Jimmy Carter.
I just sincerely hope things won't spin out of control.So, what should we do? While it may seem I'm excusing the Russians for what's going on, I certainly am not. Ukraine is a sovereign nation whose territorial integrity must be protected. While we do not have a mutual defense treaty with them (the Budapest Memorandum isn't a treaty), common human decency demands that we help them .
To an extent. There is no scenario that I see which includes
American troops (the cliché "boots on the ground") fighting in
Ukraine.
Sanctions if
Russia invades? Sure. Sending the Ukrainians military equipment (I
mean, the German helmets are a nice touch, but I'm thinking anti-tank missiles
might be a tad better)? Yes. Calling out Russia's adventurism for the thuggish land grab it is? Absolutely.
Yes, I understand the need to draw a
line. I certainly can see parallels
between Europe of the 1930s and the Europe of today. I understand history. I get it. There are no easy answers, but I can't see sacrificing thousands of our youngsters in
another war to defend another country.
It's sad to say, but it's a realistic
thing to say. Russia is no Iraq. Putin can give us a much bigger bloody nose
than Saddam Hussein ever could.
And not just because Saddam is dead.
If you disagree and think we should send our children to die in Europe for the third time in little over a hundred years, I will respect your opinion.
But, I will also think you're wrong.
*yeah, Blogger doesn't do this.