Like sand through the hourglass....
While I still have a little time before I turn 70,
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| Ten months |
I still feel the inexorable march toward when I must consider myself "elderly."
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| "Don't get cocky." "Anything can happen in ten months, ya know." |
While I don't, at 68, think of myself as "old," certainly not "elderly," I'm well past the time when I can consider myself "middle-aged."
Unless, that is, I live to 136.
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| After all, I'm not Keith Richards. |
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| "Again." |
Especially since my body has already provided me a list:
1. I no longer fart with great confidence.
NOTE: This was a line by Melissa McCarthy in Bridesmaids, but I loved it so much I've taken to quoting it. And not just because it's true.
2. My body is out of warranty, and they don't make replacement parts anymore.
3. I identify with those Progressive commercials about young homeowners who are becoming their parents. Especially the one about needing paper tickets to get on an airplane. Well, why not?
4. I won't stand to pee. Okay, possible TMI, but standing is tiring and who knows where that stream is going to go?
5. Water gives me gas.
6. I need a nap soon after I get out of bed.
7. I won't clip my toenails anymore and actually have a podiatrist do it. They have the sturdiest power tools.
8. I wear suspenders.
9. I saw Barry Manilow and Tom Jones in concert and bitched about how loud they were.
10. I won't balance on one foot to put socks on anymore. One concussion is enough.
There's more, of course, but it's almost nine o'clock.
I’m tired a lot these days (I turned 65 last April), not for sleeping ~ oh no can’t have that! Tired in the sense of just wanting to stay home all the time and read or watch tv and not go anywhere…
ReplyDeleteI do get fatigued quicker more than I used to. In fact, I commented on that very thing yesterday to my wife.
DeleteThen I took a nap.
Age is just a number, my friend. What truly matters is the wisdom we gain, the memories we create, and the lives we touch along the way. May the years ahead bring you good health, happiness, and many more wonderful experiences. Keep enjoying life to the fullest! .
ReplyDeleteFrom your friend in Indonesia
Thank you.
DeleteI hope I have wisdom.
I'm 56 and I feel like a need a nap soon after getting out of bed too.
ReplyDeleteOh, to be 56 again! NOTE: When I was 56, I was all like "Oh, to be 46 again!"
DeleteI'd love to be approaching 70 again. Wait until you're over 80 and that list grows even longer. But you don't have to worry because you've already learned the most important lesson about aging.....humor, laughing at yourself.
ReplyDeleteI remember how depressed I was when I turned 30. In retrospect…how incredibly naive. You’re absolutely right. I have no intention of ceasing to laugh.
DeleteThis is Birgit…hahahaaaa! I recognize all of these. I suffer from a bit of narcolepsy which is not good when I am at work. I take a pill for that. I take a Few pills all the time. I am very happy my hubby sits to pee. I just bought 2 picker-uppers so when I drop something, I don’t have to bend down. When I get up, I make a noise, like ughhh. You see your doctor more than your friends….im not quite there yet:)
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of doctors....I wanted to keep the list at 10, but the one that I would have included was, the older we get, the more "ists" we accumulate (cardiologist, pulmonologist, podiatrist, gastroenterologist, urologist, and so on). Our General Practitioner was more than adequate in our 20s. Now? He or she is a coordinator for specialists.
DeleteI took a nap yesterday after getting out of bed. Of course, I had a cold, and the nap helped. My father just turned 80 this year, and I think I can confidently say you have at least another good decade left. I mean, 70 is the new 50. Maybe I made that up, but it seems that way.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right. This morning, I found myself singing along to the radio as I washed dishes. I also boogeyed to the tunes as I flung suds. Granted, the station I was listening to was called "The Time Machine." But, still...
DeleteI like to call this post-middle aged season 'The Third Act'. Sounds so much nicer than old age. You do start to think about how much life is behind you vs. what's out front. My hubs loves to comment on fellow diner's choice of entree and I remind him of the commercials because I guess we're there. Still young (ish) at heart though!
ReplyDelete"The Third Act." I like it.
Delete1- I do, but depends on the recent diet... 2- Yep, bondo and duct tape! 3- Or the one where they don't understand the concept of 'influencer'. 4- Ditto. 5- Serious? Me it's potatoes and zero sugar chocolate (not at the same time...) 6- At least by 1:30... 7- Here we diverge... at least, while I can still reach 'em... 8- Still good with a belt. For my pants, that is. Of course... 9- Last concert I went to gave me a mild concussion. Of course, it was Local H, so... 10- I can't do that for pants, let alone socks!
ReplyDeleteThat influencer one cracks me up!
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